Squealing & Screaming Already

The anticipation is real, but so is the hesitation. 

I've been a fan of American Horror Story since my sophomore year roommate suckered me into watching it. I'd never been someone who enjoyed being scared. I have a vivid imagination and horror never suited me. Or so I thought. Asylum was my first taste of it and after Adam Levine's arm got bitten off, I was hooked. Asylum was psychological, thrilling, bizarre, and worthy of a few blood-curdling screams from my side of the television. Coven was interesting. The shocking moments were few and far between, which was nice for the people I watched it with because I wasn't shrieking all the time. I didn't feel any real adrenaline pumping, though.

Sidebar: Coven ranks the highest of the three seasons on Rotten Tomatoes with an 81% from all critics. When you click the top credits option, however, Coven drops to a 73% and Asylum scores a 78%. 

What does get my adrenaline pumping... CLOWNS. Put on a red nose and I'm out. I can't even sit next to the statues of Ronald McDonald without feeling the inclination to puke or cry. That said, I am beyond amped for the new American Horror Story installment: Freak Show. The minute FX released the title, I felt my entire body crumble. But like many of the viewers, I am ready to torture myself, to sit and cry and scream and feel oh so alive.

Today, they released the first real trailer (eeeek!). It's funny that most news sources reporting on the release had to emphasize that it's "real". There have been fake ones circulating for months and some are pretty legit. Anyway, here it is:

First things first, I'm glad they haven't dropped the tradition of creepy music. The music for the AHS intros and promos have been spot on each year. Hauntingly eerie and uncomfortable, but catchy. This particular tune comes from Melanie Martinez, an alum of NBC's The Voice, who's one half Lana Del Ray and one half Lorde, mixed with a dose of crazy pills (seriously watch her Dollhouse music video and not squirm).

Thankfully, we finally get to see Jessica Lang, in all her glorious bitch power. Each year, she's flawless and with her character closing out the promo (the tents literally fall when she walks out) it proves that this season will be no different. Her character is an immigrant from Germany (cue the stereotypes about German women) who oversees the freak show.

Still missing, however, are returners Emma Roberts and Gaborey Sideibe. The only clues on Roberts's character is a name: Maggie. Sideibe's character has also been kept on the DL too. We know just her name: Patricia. Perhaps they don't have as prominent roles in this season, but we'll just have to wait to find out. I should mention that Sideibe was cast in a series called Empire, which is now in post-production, and could have caused scheduling issues.

Sidebar again! For those concerned that the promo isn't scary... click here and watch all of the short teasers. They're absolutely awful in the best way possible. If they're our gauge for how scary the season will be, I'M ALREADY HORRIFIED.

Here's the official description of the new season, as released by FX and creator Ryan Murphy (I still can't get over that he's the man behind Glee too):

"Season four of the FX anthology starts in Florida, circa 1952, and centers on a troupe of curiosities that arrives at the same time that a dark entity emerges, threatening the lives of townsfolk and freaks alike. This is the story of the performers and their desperate journey of survival amid the dying world of the American carny experience."

Fun Fact! Ryan Murphy directed the first episode of Freakshow... he hasn't directed an AHS episode since the very first episode of season 1, Murder House.

The only other major tidbit the Internet gives us in regards to the new season comes from IMDB. They have the first four episode titles listed!
ep 1: Monster Among Us (shaking in my boots over here)
ep 2: Massacres and Matinees (stop it right now *cries*)
ep 3: Edward Mordrake: Part One (who is this dude?)
ep 4: Edward Mordarke: Part Two (he has to be important if he gets two parts, no?)

The most frustrating this about this whole thing is that we still have some time to wait before the premiere on October 8th. So sit tight and brace yourself for the best worst season of AHS.